Thanksgiving, final entry

I am so fucked. I am back in L.A. without Michelle because Michelle broke up with me. This whole thing is such a big complicated fucking mess, I don’t even know where to begin. But I’ll try to explain what happened.

Everything was going great. I was getting in good with her parents. We went out Wednesday night and I hit it off with her old friends. We even fooled around in the car before we went back to her parents’ house.

The next day was Thanksgiving. Greg and Quinn showed up around noon. I was helping Michelle’s mom get the food ready. When I met Quinn she seemed normal and nice. But when Greg showed up, he gave me a dirty look and was basically a dick to me from the minute he met me. (Greg is Michelle’s youngest sibling–he’s 22.)

I thought he was acting so weird that I asked Michelle what his deal was and she just said he’s moody. Fine, okay. Not everyone has to like me.

We sat down for dinner at four. The family was catching up with each other. Then the conversation turned to me and I told Quinn and Greg a little about myself. Then in the middle of the dinner, Greg says, “I feel like I already know you.”

I said, “Why’s that?”

He said, “Because I’ve been reading your blog.”

I turned white.

Michelle said, “What blog?”

Look. It’s not like I’ve been keeping it a secret from Michelle. I told her about the project. How I’ve been trying to better myself by talking to strangers. She’s seen me do it a million times. I just never mentioned that I write about it in this blog.

Greg pounced, “You’ve never read his blog? It’s all about you.”

Michelle looked at me with this awful look of betrayal.

Her Dad asked, “What’s this blog about?”

I tried to explain that it wasn’t about Michelle. It was about talking to strangers. But she’s a big part of my life and naturally she’s in it sometimes.

Her mom said to Michelle, “You didn’t know about this?”

At this point Michelle excused herself and went upstairs. I excused myself, too. Then we got into a fight. She said I should have told her. She asked what kinds of things I wrote about her. I said it was nothing bad. That yes, I should have mentioned it but it was no big deal. She said she feels like an idiot in front of her family showing off her new boyfriend only to find out she doesn’t even know he’s writing a secret blog about her behind her back. I said I was sorry. She said she needed to be alone for a while.

I was stuck. No way I was going back downstairs to hang out with the family. So I told them I was going to go for a walk and that I’d be back in a little while.

I walked around the neighborhood for an hour, feeling like someone had punched me in the stomach. During that time, I found out when I got back, Michelle read the blog. The entire thing.

When I got back, she said she needed some time to think about this. I said that I would go back to L.A. She said fine. I said, “We can get past this, can’t we?”

She said, “I don’t know.”

I felt like there was a ray of hope.

Then she said, “I don’t know if I can trust you again. I think we should spend some time apart.”

I said okay. I packed my stuff, said goodbye to her family, and went back home.

Thanksgiving (Meet the Parents part 3)

What a relief. I am up here in Michelle’s parents house in Nob Hill writing this blog entry on my laptop while Michelle helps her mom do some last minute food shopping.

Meeting her parents went great. Michelle’s Dad is in finance, so I was able to talk to him about banking for a while and that was a great ice breaker. I definitely gave him the impression that I’m not an idiot.

Michelle’s mom teaches art history at SF State so we didn’t have as much to talk about right off the bat (I am ignorant of all things related to art). But we did find some common ground talking about food. I asked what we were having tomorrow and I told her what my mom usually makes. We talked about food and families. She was surprised that my parents are still married. I guess it’s unusual for a couple like me and Michelle to have both sets of parents never divorced. I could tell she felt that I came from “a good family” because of that fact.

Tonight, Michelle and I are going out with some of her old friends from high school. Then tomorrow her brother and sister show up and it’s turkey and stuffing. I feel much better now knowing that the pressure is off!

Meet the Parents, continued

I’m off tomorrow to San Francisco to meet Michelle’s family. Thanksgiving dinner will include her mom and dad, younger sister Quinn, and younger brother Greg.

I have to say I am more than a little nervous. I mean, yes, I have acquired mad skills talking to strangers for the last 18 months. But these people aren’t strangers. Plus, I need this to go well. Talking to strangers is a success whether I make a new friend or some douche in an Audi tells me to fuck off. I can’t lead with, “So how do you know Michelle?”!

I’m not saying that I am only capable of superficial conversations. But meeting strangers by its very nature starts out at a superficial level. As you progress, you dig deeper. Most of the time, I don’t get that far. It’s a lot of ice breakers and cocktail conversations. Few of my encounters have turned into lasting relationships.

On the other hand, some of them have. I guess I just want to make a good impression because I know Michelle is close with her family and values their opinion. It could be an insurmountable obstacle if I screw this up. And I can’t let that happen because I can’t imagine losing her.

Meet the Parents

It’s November and that means Thanksgiving is just around the corner.

Guess where I’m going this Turkey Day? That’s right, San Francisco to have Thanksgiving with Michelle’s family.

It’s a big step I think meeting the parents. There’s also going to be Michelle older brother and sister who are both lawyers so I’m sure that will be fun, too. My strategy is going to be to treat it like talking to any other stranger. I’m going to ask a lot of questions and let them do most of the talking. People love to talk about themselves so hopefully that will make me look like a good listener.

Scott Is Here To Stay

Scott found a new apartment to live in but suddenly the thought of him leaving made me sad.

I’ve grown used to having him there. It’s fun having a friend around all the time. And as much as I miss my privacy, it’s also nice never being alone. So I told him he could be my roommate for as long as he wanted to. We worked out a rent agreement and now he’s officially my roommate, not just a temporary guest.

I’m going back to Pennsylvania for Thanksgiving and Scott is headed out to Arizona to spend it with his sister. Be back next week.